Next Year

It is next year now!!!! For the first time I really haven't made any New Year's resolutions. I tell people that my resolution is to learn to say no, but that has nothing to do with New Year's, I resolve to learn to say no every time I stretch myself too thin!

No one ever makes New Year's resolutions with bad intentions, most resolutions are about making oneself a better and/or healthier person. I just don't think most resolutions are kept much past January 3rd, if they are even started at all, after all we don't want to throw the rest of the dessert from New Year's eve out do we?.

Just as I am not making any resolutions I probably wouldn't keep anyway, I am also not starting 2011 of filled with excitement and hope as I usually do a new year. I usually watch the ball drop with butterflies in my stomach in anticipation of all the good and exciting things the new year will bring. Every year I am convinced that it will be the magical year where all the difference is made. The year where a cure or treatment for MD (you can really add any of the terrible chronic diseases out there) is found.

It may sound as if I am very pessimistic right now, but I don't think I am. I am realistic, and being realistic is better than being a fool. By believing that the turn of a calendar will change anything at all, you just set yourself up for failure! Change is an ongoing process that takes place all the time. A process we have to be active participants in. 2010 was definitely a year of change for me, and I left it in a very different place than I entered it.

The biggest change has definitely been the fact that I finally started to fight my "turtleitis" (some of you may remember that I used that term in my introduction to the blog). Opening up, and telling people about my fight with MD, has made life easier in so many ways. I not only learned how many people really care about me, but I also learned how many people don't care one bit that I have MD. They define me as Pernille and not as Pernille with MD. That is a positive change I would have never even imagined when we entered 2010! I have met so many wonderful and inspirational people all because I decided to write this blog...Coincidence?

Another change has been my search for something bigger than myself, and I have spent hours and hours reading and researching. I have asked stupid questions of people, and I have had to give in and admit, that there is a God out there. The biggest reason, and possibly also simplest reason, for me to decide that there is a God, is that there are to many coincidences in life for them to be coincidences! Someone has to be putting them in place. I am very insecure about what the acceptance of a God means. Some say that it is pretty straight forward, and maybe it is, it is possible that I just put way to much thought into it. Either way, the journey is still interesting, and I look forward to continuing it this year.

I have not had a chance to be that active in the pool most of December because it has been really really cold, but beginning Monday I should be able to go back. The reason why I mention the pool is that my neurologist has allowed me to increase my albuterol by a small amount every day just to see if I can get an added benefit again. I hope so! I will do my best to remember the albuterol updates.

Finally, there is one area of 2010, where that has been very little, if any change at all, and that is the progression of the MD. I am leaving 2010 in much the same place as I entered it, and I thank God for that!


Happy New Year!

P

Contact email keepinghopejourney@gmail.com